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How to Visit New Parents
Make your visit helpful instead of stressful with these practical tips
Before You Go
Text first to ask if now is a good time
They may be feeding, sleeping, or just need space
Plan for 30-60 minutes max
Unless specifically invited to stay longer
Ask what would be most helpful
"Can I bring food, do dishes, or hold baby while you shower?"
Bring practical gifts
Meals, groceries, or offer to do a task
Be prepared to leave if they're overwhelmed
No hurt feelings - they need rest more than visitors
What to Bring
Food
- Frozen meals they can reheat
- Groceries (ask preferences first)
- Easy snacks for breastfeeding mom
- Gift cards to food delivery
Practical Help
- Offer to do laundry or dishes
- Bring cleaning supplies
- Run errands they need
- Walk their dog if they have one
Small Comforts
- Coffee or their favorite drink
- Postpartum care items
- New pajamas for mom
- Entertainment (magazines, audiobook subscription)
During Your Visit
Do This
Wash your hands immediately
Avoid This
Touch baby without asking
Do This
Offer specific help (dishes, laundry)
Avoid This
Say "let me know if you need anything"
Do This
Hold baby while parents eat/shower
Avoid This
Only hold baby and create more work
Do This
Ask how they're really doing
Avoid This
Give unsolicited advice
Do This
Respect their parenting choices
Avoid This
Compare to "how we did it"
Do This
Watch for signs they're tired
Avoid This
Overstay your welcome
Remember: They Need Help, Not Hosting
Your visit should make their life easier, not harder